Long Break

So I am on a half self-imposed break from dating. Half because I still occasionally go on okcupid and see if I have mail, respond if I do and want to, and sometimes check out my quiver. But it is really desolate out there, ladies. I took a break because I am sick of how hard it is to get something started. 1 date 2 dates 3 dates 4 - that's about how it goes. And I can't help getting a bit of a complex that most guys decide to fade away the date after we've taken things to the bedroom (whether that mean clothes come off or stay on). It's like - whoa - headed toward something that could mean actually giving of myself. No way, Jose!

I may be exaggerating a bit. But that was kind of how I felt before I decided to just stop.

After that last rough and tumble guy. I did have 2 dates with a 40-something who claimed he was not sure he wanted kids. We had a great first date. Then a really plutonic and odd second. And then nothing. Not without effort on my part. He said he had a great time and seemed to hint that he would like a third date. But when I blatently suggested one over email - there was no response. Nothing ever again. I had another date with a 45 year old. I wasn't really sure I wanted a second date. We both kind of let it fade. It's been three weeks without communication, then yesterday at 8am "Hey my art opening is tonight. Any chance you can come?" ???
I said good luck and that maybe next time with more than a few hours notice I could make it. He replied that he thought he had mentioned it to me. I had the refrain from saying - must be the new girl.

A guy who has recently written on OKC sent these:
Email 1 - "Hi"
(I write back with a book suggestion because he referenced that women could send him book suggestions)
Email 2 - "Thanks. How are you?"
(I laid into him a bit about how I cannot start a conversation on Hi. How are you? And asked if he noticed how I had obviously read his profile and responded with something that showed that)
Email 3 - Was a little better. More info. A little teasing for laying into him. And the one question "Is that better?"
(I responded with a long email with a few questions)
Email 4- He answered my questions without much for me to respond to and ended with "I think I answered all your questions."
(I sent a short response that may have been random since there wasn't anything to respond to and asked about his weekend)

If he does not ask any questions about me. I am not writing back. I am not sure I described it well enough above. But he basically is not trying. He is emailing without actually taking any interest in it and without trying to get me interested. Why do men think "hi. how are you?" is actually reaching out?

So - the break.
Thank god for plutonic groups on meetup!