Sex in the City

Sex in the city is a really depressing book. But also very poorly written. I don't understand why it was so popular or got any fame. Maybe the abrupt writing style and dialogue that often makes no sense was new and hip at the time. But, to be honest, it just doesn't work. If New Yorkers really talked like that in the 90's, its a wonder that they were such a powerful city.

But it does bring up some points that are on my mind. Points about relationships that start out exciting and then just end. Things just go bad. Things that you both were going to be so good about for each other. Mainly just being unselfish and aware of the others needs. Those moments grow fewer (or never get to be enough) and then the nagging starts. More importantly - relationships get boring. That is my biggest worry with both of the guys that are potentials right now. That they bore me. I mean, they are also interesting at times and there are plenty of moments of laughter. They are both enjoyable. The one I know better is sweet, listens, is hot, the sex is fun. But yeah - sometimes I am just plain bored. Is this just how it is until you develop a routine? Until you are comfortable enough to do your own thing even though the two of you are together? Instead of just hanging out doing something boring together just to spend some more time "getting to know each other" when you would rather be going about your day.

I know - it doesn't sound like I should be trying to have a relationship with either of these guys. Stay tuned.

Another 3 guys 3 days

It's not that I am not enjoying dating. I do like it - a lot. But I am slowly coming back into the mindset of wanting to just experience one guy at a time and not worry about wasting a few months here and a few months there. Of course, when I think like that, I start wondering if I am going to miss the "right" guy by doing that. Or get too old to have kids. Dating the 3 men is even more confusing.

The Thursday date is the guy that I am not really attracted to. He is a great great guy! I do not censor myself around him at all! I enjoy hanging out with him and he is not a bad kisser. But MAN, I just really don' t feel the romantic desire. I think "this is what a relationship should be built upon. This is a great friendship. A great connection." and then I really wish that I wanted him.

The Friday date is smart and interesting, but when I ask him about the stuff that interests him, its kinda boring (like the president of Egypt). He is also kind of pushy in the making out department. It's fun and he certainly isn't pressuring me, but its only date 2 and I almost invited him up because it was that fun to say goodnight. Oh - and he is not into wine or rather doesn't even seem interested in trying with me. At the bar when offered many interesting beers, it was as if the options were too much for him (they did not have 312 which he originally ordered) and he settled for miller light. ick!! :) I am laughing as I write such a silly judgemental phrase. So with him I think "Would I get bored really fast being in a relationship with him? Would he be open to doing things that he is not used to - new things - with me? Does he just want sex?"

God I am such a girl!

Saturday was Mary again. And it was really a roller coaster. Not intense peaks and dips AT ALL. I am still very distant from this whole dating experience. But some moments, I just loved how he would sweetly want to be touching, have his arm around me when we were watching the band. But then there are moments that I really think he is either completely uninterested in my thoughts and would much rather be doing something else. He does have ADD, so its understandable, but do I want to deal with that? I did mention that to him that I think dating is weird. Once you are in a relationship, living together, you can sort of be together separately more. You are not forced to have to figure out something to do that both of you want for a 12 hour period. You can go to a matinee and then go home and do your individual things. Will I ever get to that point?

So - sorry this blog is just same old same old. I am enjoying this but I am also confused by the whole thing. Trying to just ride the ride.